The Skill of Compartmentalizing

"Compartmentalizing," in my opinion, is an acquired skill—and a gift.

If you need a refresher on what it means, it is defined as: "Compartmentalization is a psychological defense mechanism where you mentally separate conflicting thoughts, emotions, or experiences. Your brain 'boxes up' an inconvenient feeling to stop it from interfering with your immediate ability to function. It allows you to stay focused in one area of life despite chaos in another." (Psychology Today)

I suck at compartmentalizing. I tend to take things on, absorb them, and picture them as if they're happening to me too, even when they're not my problem. So, when shii really does hit the fan in my world or in the life of someone I love, I want to freak out.

As time goes on, I realize that the problems we face often get harder. It's the inevitable reality of life: health declines, people age, and ultimately, death comes for all of us.

My goal—and my advice to myself, and to any of you reading this who may resonate—is a couple of things:

First, learn to be better at compartmentalizing, and embrace the f out of joy when it's here. Try picturing a bubble of distance or a glowing light around you when you hear terrible, heartbreaking news, especially if you're the sensitive empath type who literally feels everyone else's negative emotions or energy. If you're into praying, that helps too. Another idea is to find a mantra that helps you process what's happening. "This too shall pass" is a worldly favorite for a reason.

Next, if you haven't already, find a way to feel balanced and accept that we will all ultimately face death. An end date happens. Whether you're a believer in an afterlife—that's entirely up to you. I did read somewhere that having some sense of spirituality or connection to something greater than yourself can light up parts of the brain that help people cope and live more fully. To me, that's a comforting thought. My own faith in Jesus brings me peace, but I also believe people find hope, purpose, and strength in different ways. None of us truly knows what comes next until we experience it ourselves. Until then, I hope we all continue seeking what brings us peace, love, and a little more light along the way. 

Finally, carpe diem. Even when things are nightmarish, do what you need to do to take care of yourself and your loved ones in healthy ways. Living with mental health challenges can be a swing at times. I think I'm in control because I can stay steady the majority of the time, but it's still life, right? None of us are ever truly in full control. I need to keep working on letting go of that desire for control and instead embrace and trust whatever comes next.

Sending love and steady vibes to you all.

Jilly